Let’s say your penis is functioning normal. But today something unusual happens, and you’re suddenly quite aware of some pressing issues down in your pants.

Some penis problems are not to be scared of and happen regularly in men. For instance, erectile dysfunction is common amongst men above the age of 40. Other issues are not and should be looked at immediately by your doctor. These may be a little out of the ordinary and give your feeling of discomfort. So it’s important to check your junk at least a few times a week.

So what are these uncommon issues that may arise? We’ll let’s go into it (you may grimace at reading this, so you’ve been forewarned).

1. The Eggplant Penis

This may throw you off, but it’s actually a thing. The more medical term for it is “fractured penis” and “torn penis.”

When yo break your penis there’s a few things that happen. One is that you put a significant amount of pressure on the little boy- usually caused by rough sex – and you hear a pop followed by intense pain. This is due to a overload in pressure, which tears the delicate lining of the issue on your penis and then it expands when you get an erection. Try to keep the bedroom play safe but we know it doesn’t always go as planned.

The chairman and professor of the urology department of Southern Illinois University, Kevin McVary, M.D., says, “you zig when you should have zagged. That causes a tear in the tissue and, soon after, a large bruise under the skin that’s the color of an eggplant.”

We’ll there you go, that’s how it gets its name. Swallow the embarrassment and get the ER if this happens to you you. It’s an easy fix but if you wait too long that scar tissue can build and cause more problems to your junk.curved penis issue like a cucumber2. Along the Curve

Don’t be alarmed. A curved penis is also known as Peyronie’s disease. This condition occurs when scar tissue builds on the inside lining of the penis. Almost every guy will have some degree of scarring by the time they’re elderly. This is just from normal usage.

While scarring isn’t the issue, it’s more of the bending that occurs from the tissue when erected.

“Scars don’t elongate,” Dr. McVary says, “So, when you get an erection, the penis will shorten to the side that the scars are on. One side will expand more than the other. This causes a curve.”

While a curve alone, doesn’t mean you have a problem. It’s when there’s pain or a sudden curve that you should be concerned. Peyronie’s disease causes many curvature  forms. Some may be bent almost 90 degrees. However, without treatment, it can get worse. The good news is if there’s nothing bother you and your sexual partner, it may be a non-issue and even go away on its own.


spider veins on testicles

3. Spider Veins on Your Balls

Spider’s should never be on your balls and might even cause you to freak out just by thinking of it.

This condition is called varicocele and doesn’t have a definitive cause. Dr. McVary notes, that’s it’s actually more common than you think. Your testicals have a network of veinsand some degrade over time which changes the pressure of other veins. This is how varicocele is formed and you get the spider veins on and around your genetelia.

Just because you start seeing spider veins doesn’t mean you need to do anything about it. Varicoceles is measured in staged. You can see your primary care physician if it’s affecting your fertility. To fix the issue, a doctor would simply tie off the affected veins and blood flow would be diverted to healthy veins.


blue dots on testicles

4. A Painfull Small Blue Dot

If it doesn’t look right, then it’s probably not supposed to be there. A small or benign dot on the tip of your testicles can cause some serious problems if it gets twisted the wrong way. A lot of blood can be lost due to this.

One thing for sure. It often hurts like hell if you have this. According to Daniel Saurborn, M.D., at Stanford University Healthcare, “it feels like your entire testicle is breaking off.” Ouch!

The dot comes up because there is a loss of oxygen to the part of the testicle. Without oxygen, the blood turns blue. Fortunately, it only tends to last a few hours or a few days at most. The best treatment is just pain medications in most cases.

This condition is much different than the actual testicular torsion, in which the testicles get completely twisted. This usually ends in an unexpected ER visit.


popped balloon on ground

5. A Swelling Scrotum

In most men, we have a small amount of fluid around the testicles called hydroceles. When that fluid changes due to conditions like infection or inflammation, the scrotum can fill up which causes discomfort. One common cause of this is an STD called gonorrhea.

“It looks like a water balloon,” says Dr. Saurborn. “In diagnosis, you can take a flashlight and actually shine through the scrotum.”

A swelling scrotum can be cured with antibiotics and rest. Don’t count on playing basketball or other physical sports with a case like this. The last thing you want to do is pop your nuts, literally.

All in all, the best thing to do is get checked out if you notice changes to your junk or if there’s pain down in that region. In many cases, doctors can fix your issue pretty quickly so you don’t have to think of eggplant, spiders and water balloons.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *